Naming emotions vs. showing emotions. This touches on the earlier discussion about
heaping on emotional content in your story, but let's dig a little deeper. The bottom line here is to avoid naming
emotions in favor of showing them to your reader. Why?
You want your reader to connect with the story, right? To do that, it's important that they experience
for themselves the emotions of your characters. Here are 6 areas where you can do just that:
1. Actions - Throwing things, kicking things, turning over
tables, breaking dinner plates on the floor, and so on—examples that show the
reader the intense anger of your character.
In fact, there's no mistaking it....that girl is seriously enraged. Instead of naming an emotion, think of how
that emotion would manifest itself in an action. Actions go hand in hand with the next item on
our list.
2. Sounds - If you describe the shattering of glass and the sound
of chards spraying across the floor, it's a pretty safe bet that the person
responsible used considerable force to affect such an end. Sounds help define emotion. Let's change from anger to nervousness. Is your character drumming her fingers on the
wooden arm of the chair? What do her
manicured nails sound like on the wood?
Is it a rapid rat-tat-tat? An
unceasing click-click-click? I certainly
hope it's hardwood or she's going to
leave a mark. This leads quite nicely to
our third point.
3. Result - Did your
character throw the quart of milk into the sink in a blinding rage? What does the end result look like? Milk sprayed
across the counter? A trail of
wet footprints across the floor? You've
come this far, why not complete the picture by showing us the end
result? Keep in mind that end results
often lead to more dialogue or action.
Now we're rolling.
4. Dialogue - Word choice takes the gold medal here. Not only is it a superb way to show emotion,
it goes even deeper by showing us the true makeup of your character. I'm talking about the down deep stuff. Does he have trouble taking direction from
others? Is he immature? Is he a control freak? His word choices (and repeated emotional
displays) over the course of your story will show that to the reader in a more
believable/personal way. Truth be told,
we all know someone like that. Having
someone else call him on it creates even more dialogue and maybe even a little
conflict.
5. Body Descriptors - Even before
your character takes action, or says what they think, their body can betray
their intent. Reddening of the face,
clenching of the fists (both noted in an earlier post but back now for a
curtain call), biting of the lip, looking away in shame...all physical
precursors to that which is about to happen.
Subtle? Yes. Effective for showing emotion? Absolutely.
It's like hearing the train before it comes into view. When your readers sense what's coming, it's a
good they'll stick around to see how it shakes out.
6. Thoughts - Luke Skywalker to Darth Vader in the epic movie Return
of The Jedi:
"Your
thoughts betray you, Father. I feel the good in you, the conflict"
Ahh..nothing like a Star Wars quote to cleanse
the soul.
But I digress.
Your characters thoughts DO betray them. How cool is that? Now we all know what it's like to be a
Jedi knight. Thoughts are a fantastic
tool for setting the emotional landscape.
And Luke Skywalker, bless his soul, was nice enough to include the
granddaddy of writing components (and one of the Big 5) - conflict. By revealing Vader's thoughts, we also learn
about the dark lord's inner conflict (with apologies to He Who Shall Not Be
Named). Talk about your intergalactic
can of worms. How'd you like to be his
shrink?
All told you have a veritable
buffet of tasty treats to feed the emotions of your characters. So dish them up, pile them high and deep, and
let your readers feast!
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